Have you ever loved and been so dependant on someone that they are the first person you call/think of for anything. When something exciting happens, they are the first person you want to tell. When you’re walking home late at night and you’re scared you call them because they make you feel safe. When you are sad, they are your comfort. When you need advice, they are always there. This person is different for different people; a mother, best friend, sister, colleague, lover. We all have that one person.
I had that person, and the next second they where gone. It’s almost like losing an arm and having to relearn everything using just one. It’s paralysing. It’s heartbreaking, and I cry often but today in my quiet time God showed me something. Something I knew but clearly wasn’t practicing. He showed me that he want’s to be that for me, he wants to be my person. The Bible says God is a jealous God and he really is not willing to share you like that, not your heart, not in that way. Of course you can love people but God want’s to be your number one.
“You have searched me, Lord,
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.”
This is how God see’s you and I. How intimate is that? I am HIS PERSON that’s why he wants to be my person too because imagine loving someone this much and they take from you and then go and love someone else. That’s what I have been doing to God, hence he had to shake me. He had to realign my affection and I get it. Like giving his son for me wasn’t enough?, now he is so aware of me, so in love with me, so down for me! The least I can do is love him back. “We love because he first loved us”
This is what Grace is, this is The Grace Effect!